Thursday, May 7, 2009
THE MANY VOICES OF THE GOP
Yea so, the party is OLD and not so GRAND at the moment. It's not the party of "change" its the party of "stay the same" and that is what us conservatives like, it's called tradition. Holding on to traditional American values does not mean that we should all go nab ourselves a slave, force public worship services and hold a meeting at the OK coral for a gun-fight to get our points across. Believing in traditional American values is an effort to hold on to what made America different than the place we left...England. We reject European thought and philosophy because we are Americans. We are Ben Franklin returning to England with his coon skin hat. We are a separate entity NOT beholden to one man, only the rule of law. We are a republic. Our judge is the Constitution, and though we may argue Constitutional meaning and original intent, we are observers of old school values that were supported by it even in its infancy. So the GOP is the party of American tradition, not the party of "change" America. This is not to say America doesn't need change, just not the change offered to us by European wannabees.
In the GOP you have the Megan McCain's and Colin Powell's of the party that want the party to go further to the center, or as many will say further to the left. I say shutty the helly uppy Megan and Colin. Hell to the NO! The party is a right-winged party. We have a left-winged party already, and unless we are willing to call the democratic party the liberal party and make the GOP into the new democratic party, the idea sucks. No one in the republican party wants to be a democrat unless you started smoking the Obama crack pipe last election. No offense Colin Crack DADDY, don't laugh, it happened. Plenty of republicans, Colin Powell, went with the logic of "I hate George Bush because he spent so much money so I am gonna vote for a guy who is gonna spend more money than all Presidents put together in the history of America"...seriously where is the firing squad for these worthless as hell republicans? You are retarded, Colin Powell. Never will you hear me say, yea the republicans are worthless so I am going to vote for an even more worthless democrat...MEMO: TO: Obama supporting republicans: Even your most worthless conservative republican is better than your best democrat. OK? Got it? Don't make me hit you in the street. So NO, the republican party should not become the new democratic party. Bad idea. Megan and Colin, go hump a libtard somewhere and get it over with. But please stay, we tough love you.
Then you have the "We need to go further right" the "back to the basics" crowd. Ok, you guys are fine, but your sphincters are wound so tight that its hard for us moderates to creep in and show you some love. Just because I don't want a mass deportation of illegals does not mean I am a liberal sell-out RINO with secret Obama sex dreams. I don't sing the Rush and Hannity ballad of kissing the ass of "true" and "pure" conservatives. Fine, buy into a non-inclusive attitude and lose more elections. It must have been frustrating watching the moderate George Bush smash your republican ideals, but let's not act like Ronald Reagan was the purist conservative of them all. Bush did do some spending, but memo: so did Ronnie. Yea, George wanted a guest worker program for illegals, but guess what, RONNIE GAVE THEM STRAIGHT UP AMNESTY. So stop the Reagan worship just because he was the last most popular GOP President in the UNIVERSE. You are hypocrites for not criticizing him for the same shit you dogged W over. Just sayin'.
And then you have the religious right. The republican party is a safe haven for the religiously inclined because of its similar social ideological beliefs. This wing of the party is often the most ridiculed and demonized section of the party. The term "the religious right" is often touted as the psychopathic section of America and we all know the truth of the matter is that its really the liberal atheists of the democratic party that are the true psychotics. MWAH!! HA! LOVE YOU GUYS...
However, let me just point out that there is a lot of bigotry in the Evangelical wing in the GOP. They are a powerful bunch and have a lot of control over the party. This is disturbing to me. For one, they are the definers of "Christianity" and are very bigoted against Mormons and other religions. As a Mormon this pisses me off. I have written about this before, but let me just reiterate, I will not support a party that actively engages in anti-Mormon or any other form of religious bigotry. I can go elsewhere. NO, not to donkey hill, but I will politically masturbate and punch a losertarian chad any day over voting for such ass-hat idiots in the democratic party. So all you Mike Suckabee fans, take note...go after Mitt Romney because of his "abortion" views of 15 years ago you anal retentive religious bigots, we all know your real issue is with his Mormonism. NOT FOOLED.
The problem with the GOP is the identity crisis everyone seems to be arguing over. Go further left. Go further right. The "SHUT-UP RUSH" wing of the party needs to SHUT-UP even more. Seriously, does anybody think the democrats in all their gayness are dropping off ideology quizzes to their peeps to make sure they are "pure" demotard ideologues? NO THEY AREN'T...and they are winning elections. Republicans need to be able to disagree and still be united. Colin Powell does need to be a democrat and so does Megan McCain if they themselves can't hug and smooch the far-right and the far-right needs to cuddle with the moderates. Its not cool to pander to demotards just to get more gigs on "THE VIEW" the lamest show on TV. Rush and Hannity need to cross over to the losertarians and let the rest of us find some common ground we can build on. Please fondle our moderate butts and accept our GOP loyalty without our purist opinions. We ask that you just say thank you for our support. Last I checked a republican moderate vote isn't worth 3/5ths of a vote. And if a moderate candidate is our man, man-up far right sphincter squeezers. Sometimes its your turn, sometimes its not. Either way, the other choice is worse, Obama.
Conservative ideals need not change. Conservatives need to unite and stop with the Hitler-ish purist crap. Let's market ourselves as inclusive and not intrusive or exclusive. Or, we can continue to act like big fat babies whining about our trampled on ideals. Because at the end of the day, if George Bush were more popular, we would all be moderates and we would have another republican in the White House. Because so many in the party abandoned him over his non Ann Coulter, Laura Ingram, Michelle Malkin, Mike Savage idea of immigration and government spending, we lost. The party of "GET THE HELL OUT YOU COMMY RINO LIBERAL" is not gonna win friends and influence voters. Its time for the party to grow some hair on its peaches and stop acting like Obama was the alternative to our growing discontent. We all have a beef. Let's get over it like the someone once said. Get over ourselves and our elitist, unbending, conservative positions and support the party of OLD American ideals! We can allow some to have differing views and still love them as brothers and sisters in the party. Its not difficult, we learned how to do it in kindergarten. Susie likes a little blue with her red and its OK. Johnny is really really red, and we love him like he was one of our own. I need a place to park my I hate democrats vote!!
OK kids? Can't we all just get along?