Monday, October 10, 2016

Bottled Up Aggression and Other Political Angst

How do I start a blog post on a blog that has been in a long term coma since the last election cycle? The just do it. I don't know if this is the official resurrection of ATN, but maybe....
America has political anemia and the transfusion isn't going to happen for at least 4 more. Having said that, what I really want to say is WTF is going on??  All I do lately is SMH.
I have so much to say it feels as if I have nothing to say and yet my brain screams every time I enter social media, bless it's friggin heart, and bless my trash mouth for not engaging....very much.
Let's break this down like y'all are on Romper Room and I'm Miss Julie looking through my fake mirror like I know the inner workings of your shitty opinions. As a child I watched RR everyday just hoping Miss J would say my name like BeyoncĂ© did when she pimped out Destiny's Child like it was her own. I'm nobody's baby and both parties are actin' kinda shady.
First let's start with why I left. No one cares, I get that, but let's keep it real in 3 sentences or less. The Republican party lost it's way, Mitt lost, Obama sucks, the media is worthless and the American people are less than interested in truth. I've since identified myself as an independent and that means  I hate everyone. I'm a wandering nomad in a sea of ideologue sucking sucktards. I hope that was detailed enough for the academics that need intellectually reasoned stimuli that flows from my nuanced ability to explain myself. That didn't make sense, but neither does America right now so stop expecting things to make sense. See, all I do is repeat myself. I did my best to keep the run-ons to a minimum. But I like making the anal retentive grammar Nazi's cry and sniff like Donald and his cocaine binge before the debate.
Let's talk about the soon to find out he's a serial rapist/killer Donald Trump that the phants can hang with but OH HELL NO will we support that douche bag Mormon Mitt Romney. STFU you Glenn Beck fake Constitution hugging thread hanging Libertarian sheep. Wake up Republicans. You got punk'd. Those pesky little Libertarians hijacked your impressionable baby minds and coddled you like Tommy Boy's pretty little pet. Then they ripped you apart. They gave you a tin man who offers you fancy economic terms and makes you swoon because he can talk all frilly about taxes. And now you have to write 9 paragraph status updates on facebook explaining why it is you STILL support America's creepy drunk uncle that no one can leave their kids alone with. Sorry about that preposition. I'm not gonna state the obvious anymore. But I will say, folks, (I learned how to address the little people from Obama) get off the wagon. It's time. Donald Trump is dead to me and so is the Republican party until they grow up. I'm a lone wolf in the political arena. It's fine.
Let's talk Hillary. She's a sub par politician and an even worse administrator. She's a figure head to the vagina wing of the Democratic party that feel that feminism rests and resides in our lady parts. When you can write a piece using vagina and other possible female organs it's a win for everyone FYI. I could go on for 25 pages on the failures of this woman. She's not charismatic. She's not even an average orator or a snappy dresser. I could make fun of her hair but that's just petty and I'm almost to the age where old lady hair will be my only option. It's just bad hair karma and I need good hair karma. She's unprincipled and what I like to call a poll taker. She ebbs and flows with the Hollywood causes of the day. She has held a lot of high profile positions in government, but she has very little to show for it. I am tired of hearing about the emails. Americans don't care. What do Americans care about you ask? OK I'll tell you. Stupid shit.....and that's another post. Cliffhanger: millennials care about being instagram famous and a rich mommy blogger who only eats organic food and is hot enough to be a pole dancer that cooks like Mario Batali. Line up professional photographers we need you at least once a month.  I wish eye rolls made noise.
Back to Hillary. I won't be voting for her. I'm not voting. And it's my constitutional right to bird finger all of it. And if one person tells me then you can't complain, then I will refer you to my lawyer who is myself and I say oh yes I can! I didn't know my first amendment rights were predicated by voting. I'm pretty sure it's a guarantee no matter how crappy of a citizen I am. I'm OUT.

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